I am a miracle in
this day and age, I was born in the mid fifties, my parents and those
like them are even bigger miracles so it seems in this day and age.
What makes us and those like us so special is simple. We survived.
We survived without
seat belts and airbags, without bicycle helmets and without anti-lock
brakes. We were taught how to drive correctly and we didn't get
behind the wheel and say “don't worry I've got insurance or
airbags or whatever”. We understood that it was up to us to watch
out for the other guy and be careful ourselves and we didn't have
cell phones. We survived by knowing that if you spill hot coffee in
your lap while driving it is your fault and you will get burned. We
survived being called names based on our ethnic. racial or religious
origins, you see sticks and stones may break our bones but names will
never hurt us because we had self esteem and we understood people are
different.
We understood that
taking chances meant just that you could win or lose, get hurt or die
but life was meant as we understood to be lived to be experienced.
Nothing was learned by being told what to do. You had to experience
it.
Insurance was an
option because we didn't have millions of lawyers to support. If we
kids got into a fist fight the police were not called. It was kids
being kids and you learned that fighting solved nothing.
Gun control meant
that if you used a gun for a crime there was a law against it and you
went to jail. You treated your teachers with respect or your parents
made sure you did. If you didn't get picked to play on a little
league team it taught you that some people are better than others at
things and that was a fact you had to live with. Your parents didn't
sue the coaches. We understood that doctors just practiced medicine
they haven't perfected it and they were human. After school on
weekends and vacations we played outside Cowboys and Indians, cops
and robbers, war, sports or rode our bicycles. If it was warm out
our parents told us to drink a lot of fluids. A/C wasn't around a
lot back then and we understood that the pioneers who founded this
great country did so by walking or riding horses across it and
working in whatever type of weather Mother Nature dished out. They
were not wimps why should we be. We swam in lakes, ponds, and rivers
without lifeguards. If we wanted money for things kids wanted we got
paper routes, sold seeds, cut lawns, shoveled driveways. In short we
earned our way and didn't expect handouts. We said please and thank
you, excuse me and I'm sorry. We swore too but never in front of
adults. We snuck cigarettes and beers from our parents and learned
first hand what it did to you. How the first puff on that cigar or
cigarette turned you green. How too much liquor made you vomit and
feel lousy for a day or two, in short we learned moderation. Try
riding a bicycle after a few beers when you are in your teens and
you learned first hand why not to drive drunk. When you played with
fireworks you knew you could get hurt so you were careful.
Most laws back then
were based on logic with the majority in mind. Our parents
understood that if you didn't make enough money you couldn't live in
a nicer part of town. That wasn't considered discrimination but
rather it was considered an incentive for you to get an education and
a better job so you made enough money to do so. You didn't expect or
require the government to use tax dollars to help you move into a
nicer home. Back when I was growing up the government was not a
re-distributor of the wealth. If you didn't have money for food or
rent, your family, friends or churches helped you until you got back
on your feet. Living on public assistance was not widely used and
definitely wasn't considered a career choice as it is today. If you
couldn't afford to have a child you didn't until you were able to.
You didn't expect the government to pay for your child and then give
you more for each successive one. We understood talent,
intelligence, strength and other qualities were prized gifts from God
and we didn't expect standards lowered. We understood that standards
were just that, a measuring mark so that those with true gifts could
see them and reap the benefits of the gifts given to them by God, not
something to be lowered so that we could have a false sense of pride.
When I was a junior
in high school 7 of my friends were killed fooling around in a car.
No drugs or alcohol were involved, rather the sense of normal teenage
invulnerability. There was street on the outskirts of town where if
you took the bump at the right speed, the car would become airborne.
Many of us myself included did it and lived. They didn't. No crisis
teams were sent to the school, we weren't coddled. We were told this
was part of life. You are born you are going to die, some young some
old but it would happen to each of us. It showed us our mortality.
We weren't told there was a certain correct way to grieve, we had to
learn on our own what worked for us, what got us through this sad
time. We grew up a little bit more that day and learned to look
inside ourselves for our own strength. A year later some of my
friends and acquaintances were off to a tropical vacation courtesy of
the U.S. Government to a country called Vietnam. Some made it back
some didn't but once again we learned and grew up. During this same
time time we learned about trust and belief in other kids, adults and
the government. Some us marched in protests against the war and kept
that philosophy forever. Some marched and changed their minds and
some didn't march but later changed their minds. We went in all
directions. We were learning to think for ourselves.
We were brought up
to respect the police. We were taught that you did what the officer
said when they said it or you suffered the consequences. When
someone ran from the police and there was a high speed chase no
matter how it ended it was the person who ran who was at fault. If
you tried to hurt or kill an officer and you were hurt or killed it
was your fault. There were no organized parades in honor of people
who tried to hurt or kill police officers. Again we were taught a
simple logic, We The People needed some protection and so we gave
some power to some people, it was called Law and those people
enforced it. We found that for the vast majority of the times it was
not abused and when it was logic again prevailed in that these
people enforcing our laws are just that people, as good or bad as the
rest of us and branding all of them bad because of one would be like
saying all accountants are crooks when you find one embezzling. We
remembered that these officers have to make decisions in a split
second that the rest of us did not want to make ever and that was why
we had them and when errors were made it was just that an error. As
when you add a column of numbers incorrectly, so we didn't try to
crucify them for mistakes. I played played with a neighborhood kid
who was shot by an officer while he was running from a crime. No
marches were held he should have just stopped. His family didn't try
to get him sainthood, they were just embarrassed. You see they had
true pride and self esteem that would not let them be false to what
they knew was right.
Hate crimes didn't
exist, not because there was no hatred or bigotry but rather because
we had faith that the vast majority of the people were good and by
letting the others say whatever they wanted to, no matter abhorrent
was fine because nothing would come of it except to show what type of
sick individual that person was. We were also taught the First
Amendment of the U.S. Constitution. That the right of Free Speech
was very important and as our teachers were wont to say and the way I
feel now, “I may disagree totally with you but I will fight to the
death for your right to say it, because if they shut you up today, it
might be me they shut up tomorrow”
We were brought up
on Westerns where you learned that a mans word was his bond and his
name was all that he truly had and to sully yours would haunt you
forever. They also taught us to make do, to depend on ourselves and
not look for or expect help from anyone else including the
government. A true man took care of his family then if he could, his
neighbors and friends. Also we didn't go around whining or being a
cry baby saying this isn't fair these people have all this and I
don't. We were taught you worked for what you wanted or needed and
didn't expect handouts.
We were taught
right from wrong and what was right was right and what was wrong was
wrong. Lawyers and technicalities were the province of the weak,
greedy and dishonest.
We were taught that
the U.S. Constitution guaranteed us life liberty and the pursuit of
happiness, happiness is not guaranteed. We were told God created all
people equal not the government and no matter how many laws they pass
all people are given limitations by God, and men and governments
cannot change that fact.
We were taught to
respect our elders and by that token to respect all People.
I miss those days!
Jim Neilson
